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"These Boots Are Made for Walking:" Why Wives File for Divorce" [Click Here to read the study by by Margaret F. Brinig and Douglas W. Allen (PDF)] A report published in America, "These Boots Are Made for Walking:" Why Wives File for Divorce" by Margaret F. Brinig and Douglas W. Allen shows that the over-riding reason why a parent initiates a separation or divorce is driven by self-interest. This confronts the myth that is widespread - no doubt to cover the embarrassment of women who are the applicant in 95% of cases where there are children in the marriage - that the application is made because of their concerns for the welfare of the children. By definition these "private" family law applications confirm that there are no child welfare issues that should concern the public. If there were genuine concerns for the welfare of a child it is obligatory in almost all jurisdictions that the abuse be reported to the police and/or child care protection agency. It is then up to the state to initiate proceedings against one or both parents and this is deemed "public" family law as there are worries for the child that are of genuine public concern. In private family law, which accounts for 99% of all family law, the study found that individuals apply to the courts for separation or divorce when they have a high expectation of obtaining custody of the children and the lion's share of the family's assets through the exploitation of their spouse. However, the study also found that individuals may also file when they are being exploited too much within the marriage, as when the other party commits a major violation of the marriage contract, such as desertion or cruelty. Interestingly though, cruelty amounts to only 6% of all separation or divorce filings in the study. The study found that in the majority of applications the women applies simply because she believes separation or divorce will personally suit her better. Until the courts started to wrongly interpret family law as if there was a no-fault element a spouse knew that if they wanted to desert or commit adultery they would suffer personally. They knew they could only apply for money from their spouse if the spouse had deserted or committed cruelty. This kept many from straying and prevented any spouse from seeking a separation or divorce on a whim. However it is apparent that the reason for the vast majority of applications today - by women - is mostly driven by the ease with which solicitors and the courts accommodate "no-fault" type applications and allow spouses who are 'bored' by their marriage or, even worse, by deserters and adulterers to exploit the other partner. To combat this, tougher laws, or in most cases, simply the strict enforcement of the existing moral law is required. Family law reformers must insist that custody and maintenance rules do not allow a deserter to benefit from her transgression. The authors oppose any rules which favour one parent - usually the mother - over the other such as "winner takes all" or "maternal preference" or "primary caretaker" as these all violate anti-discrimination laws. The authors favour laws that take fault into account as they show that this will inhibit family breakdown more than any other factor. They also recommend that where separation is not reconcilable that custody orders reflect the married family situation and the presumption in law that the welfare of the children is to be found in the care of both their parents working together. This presumption can only be overturned if a judge specifically orders a certificate of unfitness to be issued against one or both parents. The presumption means that if one of the two fit parents is implacably hostile to co-operating in a consensual way with the other spouse the courts and government policy are precluded from supporting them. When strictly adhered to this approach will result in the children being cared for by the more reasonable parent - ie the one who understands that the welfare of the child can best be found by the parents acting in conjunction with each other. [The report mentioned above can be downloaded from the Reference Section of our website, www.family-men.com] Roger Eldridge, Chairman. National Men's Council of Ireland, Knockvicar, Boyle, Co. Roscommon Www.family-men.com Tel: 00 353 (0) 71-9667138 Email: familymen@eircom.net |